As a final piece for our haiku we decided to combine all 3 ideas into one video in the right order. When creating the video we used the original hand written sentences and edited them for a more personal feel, also so that it was clearly shown what the original haiku lines were. I think this turned out extremely well and was a success as our piece carried the message well, as well as telling a story that is relatable for all university students.
Throughout the crit we received a wide range of feedback:
- The relax for 'pub with friends' was a favourite.
- The video was quite fast; could of been slower on the images and video so everyone could look at them longer.
- The failure idea could of been presented as a video; someone walking on the road to failure.
- The video had a good narrative, told a story; waking up tired, failing, then going to the pub to relax.
- The images were interesting and pleasing.
- Clearly carries the message, picked out the keywords from each phrase well.
- Kept a good structure.
When watching/looking at the other groups' final pieces, I had 3 particular favourites.
1. The glamourisation of mental health; the balloons popping represented a burst of emotions, I love this meaning behind it. The experimentation was great and looked like a really fun process.
2. The presentation of the pillow with hand written text on, being ripped open. I loved how it started simply with showing the haiku written on the pillows then suddenly it turns into a crazy pillow fight/mess. The slow-mo of the feathers flying everywhere also looked really effective.
3. I loved the stop motion presentation as well (the one with the beer and spiders) the humour in it made the whole thing a lot more fun and enjoyable to watch. It was clear to see what the original haiku was, it also had a nice ending as they showed the credits/who it was staring (each person in the group) this made it more personal and natural.
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